Don't cut me bro!

Finally something smart from hippy-dippy San Francisco. Superior Court Judge Loretta Giorgi struck a measure from the city’s November ballot banning most circumcisions. The good judge said the proposed law violates the Constitution’s guarantee of religious freedom. Yes! Circumcision is right there in the bible. And that’s enough for me. Admittedly, it’s in the Old Testament, which also advocates stoning adulterers and banning the consumption of shellfish and pork. But I’m pretty sure that the bible also protects your right to bear arms, so you have to take the bad with the good. Lefty proponents for allowing San Francisco to be the first U.S. city to hold a vote on circumcision argue that it’s a form of male mutilation and is unnecessary since it is not usually performed as a “medical” procedure; the ballot measure included an exception in cases where it is needed for health reasons. I say Americans should be in charge of decisions about their own bodies. Except, of course, in case of abortion. Hey, if a child objects to being circumcised, he should speak up!

Farm Teams

College football teams are acting like little more than triple-A clubs for the NFL. The term student-athlete seems to be anachronistic, a relic of bygone days and college lore. The University of Southern California is about to serve its second year of severe penalties and was stripped of a BCS national championship because its Heisman Trophy winner was treated (and paid) like a professional football player. The Ohio State University has vacated its football victories from last year and awaits NCAA sanctions stemming from favors to team players. The University of North Carolina, Auburn University (last year’s football national champion) and the University of Oregon (last year’s runner-up) are all being investigated by the NCAA for violations. College head football coaches routinely earn more than $1 million per year, not including endorsement contracts. And university scouts are currently offering football scholarships to players who won’t graduate from high school until 2013. Pro football is big business. And college football is following suit. The University of Texas is developing its own television network to control broadcast rights of its athletic programs. Other colleges will watch closely. There’s money just waiting to be made.

We Suck

I’m tired of doom-and-gloom media coverage about the decline of the USA’s economic global stature. Ask a random citizen on the street which country has the largest economy and you’re likely to hear “China” as the response. Not true … at least not yet. And we’re still number one in all matters related to military might, spending more annually than all other nations on earth combined. What I am pissed about is our decline as a sports power. We’re really beginning to suck. Japan just won the women’s World Cup. Another year without an American winning the British Open golf tournament. And Rory McIlroy, a guy from Northern Ireland – a country about the size of Rhode Island – wins the Masters golf tournament this year. Granted, golf isn’t a “sport” so much as a hobby, and most Americans could care less about soccer. But tennis is a real sport, and we suck there, too. No Americans in this year’s Wimbledon finals, semi-finals or even quarter-finals – men or women. A Chinese woman won the French Open tennis tournament; no American in sight. At the last Summer Olympics, the Chinese won the most gold medals. And at the most recent Winter Olympics, who took home the most gold? Canadians. Think about that for a moment. Even this year’s NBA champions, the Dallas Mavericks, have as their best player a guy from Germany. Really? In a sport the USA “invented.” At least our teams still dominate pro football and major league baseball. Baseball is a sport – right?

Bright Idea

It’s refreshing to see Congress concentrate on the important issues facing our nation. Like repeal of the light bulb efficiency law. With all the bluster this week about imminent financial disaster if the government debt ceiling isn’t raised, it restores my faith in the House of Representatives that they found the time to openly debate and vote on rescinding the federal phase-out of incandescent light bulbs. Viewed as a symbol of government regulatory over-reach, Congress unfortunately fell short of the 2/3 majority needed to repeal legislation signed into law by President George W. Bush in 2007. Never mind that compared to compact fluorescent bulbs, old (or “classic” as I prefer) style bulbs are less efficient – using more energy to generate heat than light – Congress was taking a bold stand for Americans to make their own important lighting choices. I remain optimistic. House GOP leaders may soon try again to bring the repeal back for another illuminating floor vote – this time under procedures that require only a simple majority. Let’s hope so! But prospects for passage are not favorable in the Senate, controlled by less enlightened Democrats, the true dim bulbs in this riveting debate.

Big Boned

“Nation is getting fatter,” read the headline. Like that’s news. Have you really taken a good look at your fellow Americans? If you prefer to think of us as pleasantly plump, consider that in a dozen states, over 30% of adults are now obese. Colorado is considered the “thinnest” state with “only” a 19.8% obesity rate; that figure would have made Colorado the nation’s fattest state in 1995. So, hang on for the puffery from the liberal media. They’ll use this latest data from the Center for Disease Control to blame high fructose corn syrup. And to advocate for big government telling us what we can and can’t eat. In fact, the difficult-to-understand, but familiar Food Pyramid guideline was recently replaced with a Food Plate to show the proportions of foods Americans should consume. Surprise! The broccoli-loving, tree-hugging vegans in charge at the USDA are pushing their “healthy” living agenda. It’s time for government to get out of our kitchens, as well as our bedrooms. If we want to kill ourselves slowly and prematurely by eating too much, consuming processed food, and sitting on the couch instead of taking a walk, well by God, that’s our right as citizens of this great big country.

Unintended Consequences

Following Arizona’s lead, other states are passing laws authorizing police to check the immigration status of suspects who cannot provide identification and detain anyone found to be in the country illegally. We’ve built that big dang fence along the Mexican border to keep illegals out. Now it’s time to round up the ones who are here and send them back, south of the border. Georgia is one of the states with tough new immigration laws. But now Georgian farmers are having a hard time finding enough workers to pick their harvest before crops rot in the fields. Who could have ever imagined that would happen? Governor Nathan Deal has responded by encouraging unemployed criminals on probation to work in the fields, replacing Latino migrants who once filled those jobs. Bravo, sir, for your creativity in the face of adversity! Unfortunately, few convicts have been willing to work the long hours of back-breaking field labor for low pay. Hey, if unemployed probationers aren’t going to take honest jobs handed to them on a silver platter, then maybe we’re rounding up the wrong people to send to Mexico.

American Men prefer Boys

A recent Gallup poll indicates that red-blooded Americans would rather have sons than daughters. And of those who prefer boys, the margin among men is greater than among women. Republicans prefer sons by a wider margin than Democrats. Younger couples are particularly partial to male offspring. This is not a recent trend. In fact, in 10 similar Gallup polls dating back to 1941, sons have beat daughters every time. So, what could be the consequences? More testosterone = more war in the future? Less support for gun control? NASCAR must be giddy. Gender screening to weed out daughters prior to birth? Sound familiar? Reports from third-world nations where girls are killed at birth are not new. And what has the impact of China’s one-child policy had on that country’s gender mix? Frankly, I’d rather have daughters. They’re nicer. Cleaner. They stay in touch better than sons. And they’re more inclined to take care of you when you’re ready for the retirement home.